My thing is before you assume you know! ASK! I have been accused! And people have gotten me all wrong wrong because they never asked the right questions.
Here recently I have been in a relationship so to speak. It’s been kind of weird. That in itself is a whole other blog. But I’ve said to be jealous! The “jealous type” and that in itself not my style. Yes to some degree people would assume that because of the way people are now days. But that is not it at all.
Let me explain! My thing is in a relationship and always has been communicating is the number one key to making it work. Communication and honesty. Today, I have been super tired and overworked. Haven’t been getting much sleep. (Honesty!)
So the first instance of this jealousy instances I have said to be happened few months back. Now little back ground! This man I speak of! I have complete trust in! He would never cross boundaries I believe he wouldn’t want me to cross. His mind and mine are alike. That being said his communication is not so good. He just goes as it comes, not really thinking it will hurt anyone if it’s not wrong. That being said.
Few months back while his mom was sick, he had a nurse come in and help. I and a few others already had bad feelings about her.(turns out we were right, she was not truthful, and well not to speak bad of her as she is she just wasn’t fit for the job!) So she stayed nights at the house and my vibes were weird already. Not him her!
So I come by and she only been there a few nights knowing sleeping was tight I asked so where does she sleep? On the couch. Knowing that’s his spot, I asked him, where do you sleep, he says well I sleep in the opposite side. Now, he doesn’t call as much as he was, texting was short, and we hadn’t talked near as much as we were. He wasn’t giving me updates on his mom.
Before she was there I was there every night helping take care of his mom, missing work, not being home with my kids, to me I was putting this first, now my kids came over when they could, and I had help with them. They are older do they understand what was going on. And seriousness of the situation.
But after the nurse got there it was like I was nobody. It felt. I get the importance of her(nurse) so it didn’t bother me as much, I felt relieved she was there to help, she knew way more than I did, and could life her up better and change her and such.
But my thing was I shouldn’t of had to ask about the sleeping situation. And yes I got upset. I got upset because it took me to ask to know. I felt, if he cared about how I feel and I mattered and my feelings mattered he would of just told me.
Next he fixes her car, not mad about that but I had asked about my tires for weeks prior, although i got She was helping with his mom and that’s why he did it. I ended up having a blow out, and stranded, not to mention.
This next instance. Abigail. I am by no means jealous of her. She is his longtime friend/sister. He says! But if I am his girlfriend shouldn’t I have an important spot too. No I don’t wanna be first all the time. I was having a bad day, and it seems he always puts these people before me. Actually he puts everyone before me.
This girls has made comments to me about him and her when he’s not around. She’s joked about being pregnant with his baby. But they are friends. I hadn’t told him that because i don’t want him to think I’m a crazy girlfriend. I’ve told him of a few things. And I’m sure she lied most woman do. I’ve seen it. And I don’t tell him most stuff because I don’t want him to think I’m causing problems between them and their friendship. I’m not that kind of person. I stay quiet more than I should probably. And people assume more than they should.
My thing is I know my worth and I know I’m a good person that’s why I have no reason to be jealous of anyone. I am me! And no one can be better than me if they want me! Or even love me! I hold my own head up always have and always will! Yea most the time I feel not good enough for some, but doesn’t mean I’m not good enough! I’m good enough for me! And that’s all I need to be! Because I know my heart is true and loyal! That’s it! No one has what I got! Plain and simple! 💋💋💋💋